Steel Drivin Man Lyrics by Arrogant Worms, The

Steel Drivin Man Lyrics

    Special guest vocalist, mike's dad: bob mccormick
    (mike's dad appears courtesy of mike's mom)

    There once was a time when the country was wide. a time before cars and planes and minivans. so, to move things from one place to the other, the railroad was built. but it just didn't up and bui
    Self. nope, it was built by the railroad men. and among these men was a man among men among men among men among men among men, a man as tall as the sky and as wide as the land. a man who could l
    Ack faster than anyone else could run. a man with the strength of ten men. his name was john henry, and i'm not gonna sing about him. no, i'm gonna sing about a lesser know figure, one who doesn
    Serve a song. a man as lazy as a thousand men. a man who could barely raise his own body off the ground. a man who was barely a man at all. his name was mike mccormick.

    Mike mccormick was a steel drivin' man
    Who never really gave a damn
    Only thing he worked on was his tan
    Mike mccormick was a steel drivin' man

    He'd get up in the morning to hammer in them spikes
    Unless he'd been up drinking the previous night
    Or if his bones weren't feeling right
    Or if it looked like it was going to rain

    He had a tendency of being late for work
    And everyone around thought he was a jerk
    He'd take long breaks and say his back was hurt
    Then he'd have a drink to ease the pain

    Mike mccormick was a steel drivin' man
    Who never really gave a damn
    Only thing he worked on was his tan
    Mike mccormick was a steel drivin' man

    Mike's dad: mike! mike! get up, mike!
    Mike: what, what is it?
    Mike's dad: get up, it's time to go to work.
    Mike: awww, already?
    Mike's dad: well, don't you want to hammer in them spikes?
    Mike: no.
    Mike's dad: oh.

    His arms were like twigs and his legs were like straws
    His hands were like a baby's bum they were so soft
    He'd wheeze and moan and whine and cough
    Then go home and take a little nap

    He never got fired cuz he was the boss' son
    He just hung around and bothered everyone
    Never drove a spike, not a single one
    Though now and then he'd give a tap

    Mike mccormick was a steel drivin' man
    Who never really gave a damn
    Only thing he worked on was his tan
    Mike mccormick was a steel drivin' man

    Mike's dad: mike! mike! mike!
    Mike: what? what is it?
    Mike's dad: they say they got a big machine that they say can drive in nails faster than any man alive.
    Mike: sounds like a good idea.
    Mike's dad: no! no! no!
    Mike: yeah, it'll work faster.
    Mike's dad: you don't understand! you see, it's gonna cost us all our jobs. you, mike mccormick, gotta prove 'em wrong!
    Mike: okay.

    So he took his hammer and hammered one time (ow!)
    He took his hammer and hammered two times (oh, jeez!)
    He took his hammer and hammered three times (ohhh!)
    Then he got crushed by a meteor and died

    Mike mccormick was a steel drivin' man
    Who never really gave a damn
    Only thing he worked on was his tan
    Mike mccormick was a steel drivin' man
    Mike mccormick was a steel drivin' man (steel drivin' maaaan)

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