[Ludacris]
High my name's Ludacris and im high as girrafes (yeah)
And im close to the edge so your parents can come push me
I curse somuch just to get on they nerves
I got kids actin a fool from the traps to the burbs
My filthy mouf it wont fight cavities or beat plaque
So i shot the tooth fairy (aahhh) and took my old teeth back
I'll take a shit on the equator, the size of a crater
And make Government officials breath harder than Darth Vader
Its the chicken & the beer that make Luda keep rappin
But no pork on my fork i dont even speak pig Latin
I go fishen on my lake wit some bitches to bake
Plus i eat many MC's but i dont gain no weight
The number 1 cheif rocker clean out your rap lockers
Im as stiff as a board your more shook than maracas
But my tricks aint for kids if you dig em' you'll get smaked
I'll clock yah, i'll spring forward you'll fall back (whoo)
Every album that i drop has got more than ten bangers (yeah)
Thats cause im a shot caller ya'll fools are crank yankers (bells)
Aint a damn thing changed but the ice on my chain
I get chicks from Portland Oregon to Portland Maine
Now i role up torpedoes, get blunted wit rastas
For a hefty fee im on your record like Bob Castas (yeah)
I own so many jerseys, im a throw-back mess
I hit the cleaners an tell em' "i want a full court press" (owe)
So mama toast yah glass while im countin my cash
Cause every single is a smash, im hot as a camals ass (ha)
The competition never just wanna admit that they lost
And that they last about as long as my part in The Wash
From your car to crack no one rolls witchu
One of MiniMe's shoes got more soul than you (ok)
So by the time you figure out why your record aint spinnin
Im in the strip club smokin, wit Presedent Clinton (cough cough cough)
So stay of the long side-burns and go-tee
They made the mold of the penis enlarger off me (me)
I'll be in another when i hit from the back (back)
Not to mention my refridgerators taller than Shaq (yeah)
So yippie ka ye yippie yi yi yo (yo), if you cant swim dont smoke my hydro (dro)
I've been lookin for a woman just to put my stamp on
But alotta ya'll are more stuck up than tampons (whoo)
So wash all you sins away and start prayin (yeah)
If God's line is busy you might have to two way him (uh hmm)
And catch me in your back yard playin crokay
And when im drunk i'll be tellin kids "drugs are bad umm-kay"
Or watch me swing my chains at the Rascals of Peko
Got seven cars I get all my rims at chrome depo
And people think im bad they say "ooh he's so evil"
Cause i go on blind dates with actual blind people (owe)
But my albums out the store, yours be on the shelf (uh hmm)
I heard you masterbate alot so ya'll keep to yourself
Cause these women want a man to stay up and stay strong
Like the NBA, you gotta play hard or go home
All that shit that ya'll talkin ya'll can pop it to them
Cause Ludacris will beat you down with a prosthetic limb
I'll put so deep in your ass that you can smell it
And your breath'll turn to Footlocker water repelant
Im the man i got money far as the eyes can see
And im in a group i split do wit me me and me
So much money in my jewlery that im damn near sorry
So ima trade my earings in, and get a Ferrari (whoo)
I buy cars wit straight cash, have meetins wit Donald Trump
Yall meet wit Honda, no payments for 12 months (uh huh)
Take a look at your life and no wonder your so sad
Ya'll put up wit more shit than a colostomy bag
ha ha ha