Army Lyrics by Ben Folds Five

Army Lyrics

    Well i thought about the army
    Dad said, son you're fucking high
    And i thought, yeah there's a first for everything
    So i took my old man's advice
    Three sad semesters
    It was only 15 grand spent in bed
    I thought about the army
    I dropped out and joined a band instead

    Grew a moustache and a mullet
    Got a job at chick-fil-a
    Citing artistic differences
    The band broke up in may
    And in june reformed without me
    And they'd got a different name
    I nuked another grandma's apple pie
    And hung my head in shame

    Been thinking a lot today
    Been thinking a lot today

    Oh, i think i'll write a screenplay
    Oh, i think i'll take it to la
    Oh, i think i'll get it done yesterday

    In this time of introspection
    On the eve of my election
    I say to my reflection
    God please spare me more rejection
    'cause my peers they criticize me
    And my ex-wives all despise me
    Try to put it all behind me
    But my redneck past is nipping at my heels

    I've been thinking a lot today
    I've been thinking a lot today
    I've been thinking a lot today
    I thought about the army...